Category: Reflections

June reflection

The holidays are just over for the kids. They are back in school for the 3rd term and it’s back to a more hectic schedule for me as compared to 1st semester. It’s time to kick things into high gear. Lots of things have happened during the first half of 2017.

Plans have changed and many different revelations have been revealed to me through the months. Even though there was much upheaval in our lives we managed to pull through without too much damage emotionally and financially.

It has been mentally exhausting dealing with FAKE people who were parading around us.  They were really pest !! It didn’t pay to be understanding and accommodating towards them as it only boosted their self-entitlement mentality till it got simply ridiculous. I know that GOD placed them in my life to give me an opportunity to grow in my faith and also become a better person. They are examples of the person I DO NOT wish to become nor do I wish my kids to become victims of such people. Their masks have finally dropped after so many years and we get to see the soulless ghouls that were parading in human skin.

I find that it is very important to teach the kids how to tell the difference between toxic and non-toxic behavior. They have to start learning NOW what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior. Values education coupled with a focus on

 

Like the song above by Timbaland sometimes somethings that have been done can’t be remedied by apologizing. The trust has been broken and nothing can be done about it. When I am done I am done. Finito!! Goodbye to you forever.  Not everyone needs and deserves a 3rd or 4th chance with me especially when it concerns the safety and welfare of the kids. If it happens more then twice it is certainly done deliberately / intentionally and the person committing the offence is  all out to cause trouble and inconvenience me in the process.

These few months we were dealing with extremely self centered persons who would rather inconvenience everyone so that they the only one who will benefit. Sometimes when they are unable to personally benefit from it they will go all out to make sure that no one else if able to benefit at all by deliberately destroying the item or even removing it without permission/ stealing it  so that we are deprived of it. Utterly wicked!!.

However due to their unwarranted actions, I am forced to step out of my comfort zone and it had accelerated my growth. and also reaffirmed that the decisions that I have made are the right ones. I find that I have lowered my tolerance level for accepting other people’s nonsense. I do not need to be drawn into their senseless drama nor need to entertain them and their needs and forsake my own in the meantime.

Not everyone has your best interest at heart. This lesson has been replayed to me several times this year through the people that I had encountered. I guess when the lesson is repeated it gets ingrained in your mind. The red flags surface faster as one gains experience handling cluster B individuals.  I learned to be more discerning and more cautious in the type of relationships I would like with some individuals.

Being too nice or caring doesn’t pay off, it feeds cluster B’s entitlement mentality. Their twisted mind , low self esteem will only cause harm and even damage to you. It’s certainly not worth being their friend even. There are some people who cannot be helped as in no way they will nor want to change their behavior or attitude.

How was June for you?

 

May Reflections 2017

I have been going through the daily exercises in the book by Bonnie Gray entitled – Whispers of Breathe.

It has been a rather turmoil month with lots of drama happening in my life.  There are many toxic people around us who are trying to take advantage of my generosity and patience.  I know that GOD puts me through obstacles so that I can grow and mature.  Sometimes I really wonder when I will get the break I seriously need.

The daily grind of life. Having sufficient cash to survive with the kids are some thoughts that I have been having on my mind. The escalating course of living in Singapore and suppressed wage system makes it extremely difficult to save a substantial sum for retirement, investment, college funds etc.

I’m also wondering when  all the toxic people will be totally eliminated from my life. It has been a very exhausting 2017 for me so far with lots of unwanted drama brought about by the selfishness/ greed of devils. I had to put my foot down in many instances so that the kids and I can be properly protected from their abuse.   I made it clear in no way their schedule/priorities in life will override mine nor the kids. So called blood ties are meaningless if all on their agenda is 101 ways of enslaving or torturing others for personal pleasure or other devious desires.

It is unfathomable that one can be so utterly wicked to want to wish hell upon their offspring or “loved one” but certainly something which I had to experience this year. Black heart individuals who do not have any redeemable qualities in my book. It can be said that I’ve seen all and nothing is beyond believable at this stage in my life.

I’ve chosen to do and be the best person I can with my limited sources and knowledge. Also focusing heavily on the WORD and surrendering my fears and worries to him. Refocusing and realigning myself constantly to keep true to my personal purpose in life. I’m staying away from those who have secret agendas or trying to derail my focus by their attempts to drag me over to the dark side.

These few years I have learned not everyone has your best interest at heart. The worst culprits are those who actually use the words” I really care about you and you SHOULD do this”- BULLSHIT!!. Seriously if one have to really utter these sentences out loud it only proves to me that you as a person is pretentious and  disillusion.  Words mean nothing if there is no action nor evidence to show results that one “claims”. The most ridiculous sentence I heard is ” I don’t need to prove to put it out for all to see” – The real reason is there is NOTHING substantial to show that’s why they are still hiding being a farce.  Anything and everything can be quantified and verified. (That’s why in every industry there are audits)

I’ve dismissed many so called” friends” who keep bombarding my whatsapp chats/ FB wall with such “inspirational stories”. As one of my FB friends have mentioned in one of his post the most inspiration that one can give is living by example and really do what you set out to do. NO questions asked. There is no need to “borrow” other’s success to add on to your personal emptiness or failure to achieve anything.  Only showing one side of your life also means that you are hiding many things and do not lead a balance life – IMO. It’s a real pity there are so many FAKE people around that makes it harder to find the GEMS to hold on in life.

I’m looking forward to a more restful JUNE and better and more meaningful experiences in life.

How was your month of May?

March Reflections 2017

March had been an extremely busy month for me. Studies had commenced for me and I was busy juggling both studies , kids and work. It wasn’t easy but I made it. I managed to finish the 4 modules from my Specialist Diploma  in Leadership and People Management from Kaplan. I have another 4 modules left to complete the course and expect to complete it come July.   Learning about Leadership and People Management has given me a better inside on how people think and how to motivate them.

There has been an surge of interest in people (Middle management) attending Leadership course during the current economic slow down. Many companies are sending their employees for  upgrading courses to sharpen their skill set as they brace for more structural changes within the different sectors.

The economy in 2017 seems worse than last year with more retrenchments and friends around me looking for job.  The pocket has to be tighten for many as expenses have risen but the pay hasn’t increased in tandem.  The expenses for our family has increase also as now Monkey boy is in Secondary school and the school fees have increased nearly double!!

I’m still figuring it out how to grow an income so that I will be able to sustain the growing family needs and at the same time improve our lives.

Any pointers to share?