I have been going through the daily exercises in the book by Bonnie Gray entitled – Whispers of Breathe.

It has been a rather turmoil month with lots of drama happening in my life.  There are many toxic people around us who are trying to take advantage of my generosity and patience.  I know that GOD puts me through obstacles so that I can grow and mature.  Sometimes I really wonder when I will get the break I seriously need.

The daily grind of life. Having sufficient cash to survive with the kids are some thoughts that I have been having on my mind. The escalating course of living in Singapore and suppressed wage system makes it extremely difficult to save a substantial sum for retirement, investment, college funds etc.

I’m also wondering when  all the toxic people will be totally eliminated from my life. It has been a very exhausting 2017 for me so far with lots of unwanted drama brought about by the selfishness/ greed of devils. I had to put my foot down in many instances so that the kids and I can be properly protected from their abuse.   I made it clear in no way their schedule/priorities in life will override mine nor the kids. So called blood ties are meaningless if all on their agenda is 101 ways of enslaving or torturing others for personal pleasure or other devious desires.

It is unfathomable that one can be so utterly wicked to want to wish hell upon their offspring or “loved one” but certainly something which I had to experience this year. Black heart individuals who do not have any redeemable qualities in my book. It can be said that I’ve seen all and nothing is beyond believable at this stage in my life.

I’ve chosen to do and be the best person I can with my limited sources and knowledge. Also focusing heavily on the WORD and surrendering my fears and worries to him. Refocusing and realigning myself constantly to keep true to my personal purpose in life. I’m staying away from those who have secret agendas or trying to derail my focus by their attempts to drag me over to the dark side.

These few years I have learned not everyone has your best interest at heart. The worst culprits are those who actually use the words” I really care about you and you SHOULD do this”- BULLSHIT!!. Seriously if one have to really utter these sentences out loud it only proves to me that you as a person is pretentious and  disillusion.  Words mean nothing if there is no action nor evidence to show results that one “claims”. The most ridiculous sentence I heard is ” I don’t need to prove to put it out for all to see” – The real reason is there is NOTHING substantial to show that’s why they are still hiding being a farce.  Anything and everything can be quantified and verified. (That’s why in every industry there are audits)

I’ve dismissed many so called” friends” who keep bombarding my whatsapp chats/ FB wall with such “inspirational stories”. As one of my FB friends have mentioned in one of his post the most inspiration that one can give is living by example and really do what you set out to do. NO questions asked. There is no need to “borrow” other’s success to add on to your personal emptiness or failure to achieve anything.  Only showing one side of your life also means that you are hiding many things and do not lead a balance life – IMO. It’s a real pity there are so many FAKE people around that makes it harder to find the GEMS to hold on in life.

I’m looking forward to a more restful JUNE and better and more meaningful experiences in life.

How was your month of May?